Rong outside

2011-05-06T22:50:00.001-07:00

2011-01-10T01:54:00.000-08:00

Yes! Today was the start of school. I'm one year older. officially senior now. xD more freedom, more choices, more independence and... more responsibilities. -shrugs- I'm sooo growing old x( but still, wisdom comes with age and thus growing older is a good trade off (in my opinion). Today was the day i met all my new classmates YAY! xD xD xD awaiting the endless wondful opportunities in SH. xD

2011-01-08T07:18:00.000-08:00

i really really really hate you. but i promised to do it and so i will. like Kaichou, i should put my best into everything. so to you, even though i hate you to the core, i'll still try to do my best. tmr is a challenge psychologically cos i really really hate you. HATE YOU. but. i must try to do my best cos i promised.

2011-01-06T04:01:00.001-08:00

i just did it again. I got all emotional over some stupid little thing. How many times have that happened already? tell me, i can't count that much.

I sort of understand why people now are afraid of truth, of God, and of light. The closer you go to these things, the darker your darkness will be. It's like seeing more and more flaws before the flawless, seeing more and more wrongs before the truth.

*Change my heart O Lord, may I be like You*

Man, i really need to apologize.

2011

2011-01-04T22:35:00.000-08:00

just a post to say I'm alive. Yeah totally as if i will be as lame as that... wait, i take that back. i can be as lame as that.... But not now.

its 2011 and it is kind of scary. Going into SH (Senior High) and becoming older is just a small part of it. I somehow feel like i am becoming different. I guess this is called growing up but looking back into the past, it is really really scary when you feel that you aren't you anymore. The you of the past and the you of the present are so different that they seem to be two different people. It's like I'm losing part of myself daily.

Sure, change can be good. I do think that i am wiser than i was before and of course much more sly (and wicked for that matter) than i was. A certain amount of naivety lost during growth is a plus definitely. But losing parts that i don't want to lose, eg a certain amount of innocence, ignorance is somehow painful. and the process of losing them is so subtle that I didn't even realize i was losing them until I look back.

it makes me wonder what else am I losing now. In this instant as the seconds pass me by, i wonder what else is changing inside me that I would never realize until it was gone for good.

Okay, the reasons i started feeling all this melancholy is because I just kindda of tabulated my JH year GPA results and voila, that can sure send someone (free fall) from cloud nine. (just for the matter, i wasn't exactly on cloud nine anyway, figuratively speaking only).

I wonder if I had tried hard enough during those years. Well, it is too late for any change anyway. Whenever i receive bad results i always push it off and console myself that it was not nearly that bad (when it actually is) as compared to XX and XX and XX. it is like self comforting by stepping on others (a habit i really ought to change). Futile, really. Cause it doesn't change the reality in any way when someone else who can be exactly the same age, in the exact same environment, but get better results (WAYYYYY better results).

i guess it is really a matter of heart work and hard work. I am always getting drawn away by games and anime. Even in primary days I was at least drawn away by BOOKS. Even though they are leisure, fiction books, but still... books are literature items and are better than some fictitious game and anime.

I think in this new year, i really ought to cut down anime. Games are not an issue since i lose interest in them in 2 weeks. Bye Kitsu saga. xD I'm really bored with you already. Anime wise is gonna be a challenge, to say the least since i kind of love them COMPLETELY. Maybe I'll just stick with 2-3 series instead of wolfing down everything that is available on the net.

i'm not gonna give up DC (detective conan) even if you beg me. xD NO WAY. gomen ne. No way for DC to go out.

I'm sticking to Kaichou definitely cos she's my goal.

And of course the world only God knows. <3>

next year (opps i meant this year) is gonna be a hell of a ride. For sure. And it's gonna be hard to keep my goal in sight amongst the things that is waiting to swamp me the minute the gates open (10.1.2011 - start of school) If you need something to picture that, imagine a ricky old gate holding against a tsunami and you get my idea.

moreover i realized, actually quite some time ago, that i'm losing God in my life. I try to keep up with appearances. For who I really don't know since God himself already knew about it. But like all masks and appearances, it breaks. This year (or rather last year) it had completely broken down already. For the last few years i was struggling to ignore the fact that i have been ignoring (to say the least) God. (to be more exactly, i have been ~~pushing~~ shoving God away)

My life's a mess, spiritually and physically. Spiritually cause of the humongous hole inside since God is missing and my growth in the spirit has come to a complete stop. And physically because without God, I've lost my purpose in life. What is the point of trying hard when all that ever happens at the end if that you die and rot? What is the point of gambette if there is nothing at the end of it?

To live is to worship the one true God (something I need to relearn)

its the new year 2011 and I am the graduation batch at 2012. I need to pull it together.

saying all that just took about everything off my chest, now I need to work hard and work 'heart'. My current goal: to be a psychiatrist (psychiatrist = doctor) and I need much better results than what i having be achieving to date. MUCH BETTER.

*With all my heart, with all my soul, with all my might, I want to love You more* For in You my Lord, i have hope, peace and joy.

-lost and found again-

Trip to Shangri-la

2009-12-02T18:58:00.001-08:00

Hello world. I am back in Singapore. Yeah.
Perhaps not so good thing.
Anyway I just came back from Bintan Nirwana Gardens.
Practically a mini taohuayuan i guess.
a real lovely place, thou kindda ex.
here are some pics. I'm putting a few here. The rest will be on tumblr. Perhaps i shall just shift to tumblr or something. Plus tumblr has my initials in it. tumbLR.
HAHA

the rest, please go see http://rongoutside.tumblr.com/

2009-11-07T02:51:00.000-08:00

hey yo. i'm back.

school officially ended. BUT... to my utmost dismayal, there is CCA on mondays.

SIGH.

BIG SIGH.

ok the piano is nicely settled in its new home. xD

and holidays are started.

my schedule is getting more and more packed.

Wuuu ><

btw EC (extreme crimsom)

and cat friend

happy holidays to u.

2009-11-03T06:16:00.000-08:00

Hello world.
the mysterious girl, known as Rong has returned to revive her blog.
updates for the world:

1. i am getting my grand piano tomorrow. not a really ex piano. China made, known as Hailun but the sound isn't too bad. Model is Hailun 178. A full size grand. Haha. before i even named it, my darling cat friend named it grandie. A tastleless name. reminds me of grandma, you know when you call them gran-dy. Haha. just cracking lame jokes to myself. Hey i know you smiled. (btw if you haven't means you have low IQ who can't catch a joke) jkjkjkjk. (just joking) HA I am sure you smiled now, at least inwardly (hey gimme some face larh)

Anyway here a pic of it for you visualise.
Pretty cool huh? It is classic black like this. We just moved the whole living out to fit the grand.
btw i live in a flat so am no rich obou-chama. (meaing rich girl larh, for those who don't read manga or watch anime or have no contact with jap at all)

Well tmr it is coming at 2pm, so i'm waiting. and my hearts singing. tmr i;m gonna practice straight for minial 3 hours. HOHOHO. i'm going piano crazy.

ah hem

back to the normal sane and logical Rong.

2. I start playing viwawa. for the mahjong. yup. and yes i finally got my 10th win. Well, sorry if im a noob. (rolls eyes) and i;m finally lvl 2 for stwack? some kind of violent hiting game with stickman. whatever.

3. and i started reading fan-fictions! haha. from fanfiction.net. they have cool storied about L and light from death note. yups. big fan of L for his sweets. WATARI, forget the anti-social detective come make me sweeeeets! jkjkjk (for people who are gooing huh????? at this, like my cat friend, please ignore it and skip down.) -smiles warmly with a hint of .....-

4. and i finally finished my first fan-pic of L. yayness. I know you are dying to see it. HAHAA. want to see ore-sama (my) art piece right? jkjkk. sorry i;m high now tho i am not supposed to be... whatever. since ore-sama (I'm) in a good mood, ore-sama (i'll) show it for you.

Too tired. to update you more. Gd night!

2009-10-26T05:45:00.000-07:00

Results today;
Kindda bad.
And knows that worst is still to come.
maths was a flop (tho kindda expected. But still.... it was a devastating flop)
Chinese as well, (expected)
Bio was the only good thing (xD)
LA was so-so bah. But kindda good. (:D)

Tomorrow is gonna be the worst.
1. maths 2 is gonna GG. we got the ans sheet today. I know about half is wrong liao. Please don't fail! OooOOOOooo
2. Chem (no idea) i forgot the entire paper alr
3. Physics (with hopeful eyes. but...)
4. History (please please please please)

Ok larh. Looking here. mayb it won't be too bad.
but just knowing that maths will GG is bad enough.

AND THE BEST THING IS
we still have lessons after exams. Woah. so inviting.
Monday still got some trip to visit some place. (seriously i wan an mc)

i lost the whatever piece of post-exam activities paper.
HAHAHA. i dun noe what one earth is happening
whatever~!

looking forward to the end of schoool.
xD
next year. gonna be mugger.

muggers YAY!
look at how interesting is a student's life.
OO i just remembered next year of O-level mep.
WOAH!
GG
and HCL
WAOH!
double GG

cya.

2009-10-25T02:22:00.000-07:00

Now that the exams are over. Trying to enjoy life. But seemingly unable to. Why?

cause monday is the killer day, the day we get back our exams papers and grades.
But there is no point stressing over it
cause we can't do anything about the exams anymore.
the grades....
be it good or bad
be it tears or smiles
everything should be given thanks for.
after all we put in our efforts and tried.

Though i say it so, i think maths/sciences paper...
is kindda GG.
along with Chi.
Whatever.

2009-10-23T06:58:00.000-07:00

Dreams.

I wonder what shall i do in the future?
Tho many people say not to think about it
but i must at least have a destination.

Sometimes i wonder what i am really good at.
Not just surface things such as grades in school.
something that i am truly good at. something that i will want to do for the rest of my life.

everyway people are just living from day to day
with simple checkpoints like having money to feed family or passing a grade in school
but where are we heading?
just getting this short term goals isn't satisfying in any way.
what is my goal in life?

2009-10-22T07:06:00.000-07:00

today was the end of class chalet. which suggests that exams are now OVER.
xD
smileys.
though i say xD, in actual fact, i am more like X_X

firstly, so draining. when i finished the last paper i was like zombie. not lack of sleep or anything. just that suddenly you release all the tension and that the fact tht everything is over sinks in. i wasn't really happy or excited the more of the rest of the class. going mad and crazy, screaming and yelling. just .... feeling empty. A kind of hollow void. physically, mentally, emotionally drained.

secondly, it was also because i couldn't say i did well. Definately not well for maths, which is GG-fied (meaning game over) no confidence for all sciences. language was a flop. Anyway it is over, i am trying to put that behind.

thridly, it just means tht i am going sec 4 soon. Sec 4 is worst than sec 3 by 3 times, or so i've heard. bad news.

oh well. things that are in the future i meant to be worried for in the future. now to the present days,

class chalet:

it is definately one of the best class chalets ever.
the most heart wretching break up and the more tearful and heartfelt reunion.
the rest is private.
Definatley one of the best class chalets.

thank to all the committe members.
xD
xD
xD

we played mahjong the whole night. slept only 2 hours. Oo
tired now,
good night.

X.X

2009-09-18T21:36:00.008-07:00

There is only relative definations in the world.
Nothing is what it is, by itself.

There is light, only if there is darkness
There is joy, only if there is pain
There is relief, only if there is stress
There is wisdom, only if there is stupidity

You are a girl. only when there is a boy
You have long hair, only when there is someone with short hair.
You are human, only when there is non-humans.
You are alive, only when there is something dead.

This is a vegetable, only when there is meat
This is a shirt, only when there is pants
This is a friend, only when there is enemies
This is a smile, only when there is a tear.

You only know yourself, when you have known others.
You are only YOU, when there are others.

Know that through this, you are knowing something else.

-Rong

2009-09-15T06:51:00.000-07:00

since i am in a good mood, tho bet it will be spoilt by tmr. i shall upload some photos! CLASS PHOTOS!

can't find a good uploader. Oo. so go to tumblr xD

http://rongoutside.tumblr.com/

post on SEPT 15

tumblr is good for it photos. xD

2009-09-15T06:44:00.000-07:00

MEP IS A BLAST! OVER
OVER
OVER
EOY MEP IS OVER
OVER
OVER
OVER
OVER
i cant get enough OVER
OVER
OVER

and we got back our mep essays which were good mostly. yay and oncert report. xD XD XD XD XD XD

cloud nine.

arigatou Lord. for keeping it with me throughout.

2009-09-14T06:23:00.000-07:00

times go bad, but the only thing that keeps us going is friendship and of course, fellowship.

i can't feel God anymore. Not that He is moving awy, it is more like i am shutting Him out. I dun know why and when but i cant even pray now. I;m going down the wrong way...

2009-09-14T05:15:00.000-07:00

tmr is the DAY. the DAY for the mep exam. and ho, what do we have here? an very unwilling student who don't wan revise. Oo.

really i'm gonna revise now. left gamelan, chi, jap and indian (?) i think.

whatever.

need to study anway.

plus things are piling alr. Need revise for tests. tmr isn't a good day. i think we are having double sciences? Science is the thing i dun wan see now. totally not for science now.

dun noe y i even posted this. xo

2009-09-13T01:14:00.000-07:00

Yes. things are looking good. i finished bio and physics revision. Alr. only left MEP and chem. MEp is really heavy but oh well, since it can't be helped.

AND EXTREMELY SORRY to those whom i snap at cause of the stress. GOMEN!

xD perhaps i will live a bit longer. xP

2009-09-12T04:52:00.001-07:00

we love the holidays! yay. because we die from hmk and rise up to heaven and live happily ever after

2009-09-12T03:14:00.000-07:00

FUWA! its pissing that i procastinated again.. in the end despite all the PUSH and all the post its and all the reminders. Man i hate myself. I have only 1 more day left with MEP memorising for EOY to do, since the eoy is ON TUESDAY!!! so dun compare say your eoy coming in 2 wks or crap. CAUSE MINE IS NEXT TUES! and all tri sciences revision, i'm so gonna kill myself or smth. and i dun get chem volumetric analysis crap. mannnnn. this sucksssssss.

i can't believe i actally left so much to do. MAN i hate this. CHioning sensation. x( sucksss. anyway no use complaining. so back to work.

CHURN CHURN CHURN! more work to do.

btw yesterday i dreamt that i screwed my mep practical. Now i am like super scared. for some reason i got my whole thing messed up... please let not dreams be reality. !!!

GONNA PRACTICE HARD> hey dreams are not fate right? cause no one challenges fate and win... oh well, i dun think fate is so free to bother about mep practicals right? whatever.

If worst comes to worst i'll challenge fate lorhs. XD haha

btw really gtg. WORK WORK WORK!

2009-09-09T01:43:00.000-07:00

Why time runs so fast. Its like 5pm! oo. I need finish hmk. WAIT FOR ME TIME!!!!

man, if magic exist i wan stop time. XD

and lots of thanks to Mr Low for your help. ;)

but after this, i really hate bankers. -.-

chimology

2009-09-08T01:16:00.001-07:00

Hello. i promised myself to start revising. but ho, here is my blog waving at me. hai.

Ok. i'll keep it short. just tag replies! xD

WENGWA: hi!
you hav the honour of me tagging for my first time in my life in your blog
>> RONG: Wow! Ok let's declare 7 Sept as wengwa tag day! (rolls eyes) btw must tag more k?

ADA: hiii link u soon alright! miss u alot ):
>> RONG: me too. mayb after exams can go out for gemma party again. last time chalet and stuff were so fun. Haha. crazy people from gemma. T.T

EILEEN:haha wengwa always luk that de hehs
>>RONG: (nods profusely) can't agree more. hahaha.

adieu!

2009-09-07T06:02:00.001-07:00

I shall tell you something extremely funny k?

today we (kaiwen and me) went to froggy's hse to play piano for upcoming mep exam and also to mug chem.

(fast forward the piano practice time, faster forward the chem mugging session)

after our mugging until about 5.45pm. me and kaiwen decided to go play piano for the last time for practice. btw we are playing four hand sugar plum fairy. you know, the cute cute one. xD

then i can't find page 2 and page 3 of my score. The first page was put with kaiwen's 3 page of scores on the piano. We began hunting for the paper.

then kaiwen suggest that it may be dropped behind the piano cause the piano is against the wall and there is this huge gap. way big enough for paper to drop in. and the ulu Punggol is very breezy. So she went to look.

then AH-HA! she saw a white white piece of paper. at the very very end of the other side of the piano.

So we were like, "wengwa, get a broom or smth to get that piece of paper out."

so wengwa got the hang clothes that pole to scoop the paper out.

but apparantly the pole not long enough. so he has to reach in, like stick as much of his head into the narrow gap.

futile.

then me and kaiwen were like, "ok jiayou. we practice piano. later no time le."

so we played the piano while he tried to get the paper out. Cause the piano soundboard is like behind the keys, wengwa was like, "so LOUD!" cause his head is stuck into the gap remember?

we laughed and played. Then finally he managed to propell the paper upwards as least visible to us who were sitting at the piano playing.

then we found out it wasn't the score it was the batman mask. We burst out laughing like mad women, while playing distorted piano. Oo

then unfortunately for wengwa, the paper dropped back into the abyss of darkness. so he had to 'fish' for the paper again, still believeing that it was my score.

then finally after much effort, he got it out. then was like 'diao' "this is batman mask, not your score."

just nice we finished playing and got up from the piano laughing. then wengwa was like "look for the score larh!"

so we looked. then i found it in my bag. lols.

so me and kaiwen began to practice properly again.

wengwa lie on the bed then was muttering, "so tired. 要累死人了"

me and kaiwen started laughing.

wengwa was like "huh? weird ppl. laughing so suddenly."

he still din noe that before he fished out the paper, we knew that it was batman mask.

after playing at about 6.05 we left his house to walk to the LRT.

then kaiwen was telling him that we knew that is was the batman mask when he propelled the paper up for a few seconds.

then wengwa: "Why never tell me earlier"

"cause anyway you need to throw away the rubbish mah, so tell u or not, you still need to take it out"

then wengwa was diaooooo.

so hilarious!

wish i took the vid down. SO FUNNY.

2009-09-07T04:55:00.000-07:00

Hey I bet some ppl are ticked off by my blog jumping.

Oh well~ this the final final final one. So onegai?

Link me. and tag so i can link you back.

MUST TAGGGGG!

tyty.

2009-09-06T12:46:00.000-07:00

somethings are more precious then anything else. and top of that list are sisters.

friendship is really something money can’t buy. it is a gift from someone else to you. A gift that is free and given back.

Thank you, Celeste.